Me: So how is the J.K. Rowling book?
Husband: It's okay - it's a lot like "Midsomer Murders" without the murders. The weird machinations of an English village. Is that MAK-inations or MACH-inations? That's one of those words your read all the time but never actually say.
Me: Don't ask me - you know I always mispronounce words. Want me to look it up - they have audio pronunciation.
Husband: No - I don't need to know. It's not like I use it a lot in conversation. Of course it could become my new favorite word and I could just throw it in anywhere "...all those machinations - you know the people from Machina.."
Me: The people from Machina...? ::Wild cackling, choking, table thumping laughter:: The people from Machina??
Husband: *Laughing* Yeah that would probably be spelled "ian" not "ion"
Me and Husband: ::More crazy laughter::
Tuesday, November 20th
BB (the orange cat): Me-ann, Me-ann, Me-ann
Me: B, since when do you talk so much. Getting chatty in your old age?
Me (to husband): Did Frankie, the motor-mouth, talk a lot when she was little?
Husband: What?
Me: Did. Frankie. Talk. A. Lot. When. She. Was. Little.
Husband: You're asking me if I remember something? Please...
Me: B, since when do you talk so much. Getting chatty in your old age?
Me (to husband): Did Frankie, the motor-mouth, talk a lot when she was little?
Husband: What?
Me: Did. Frankie. Talk. A. Lot. When. She. Was. Little.
Husband: You're asking me if I remember something? Please...
Tuesday, October 2nd
Me: If I open a package of Chuckles will you eat the black one?
Husband: Sure, I love the black ones, they're my favorite!
Me: You are the only person on the planet that likes the licorice Chuckles.
Husband: Really?
Me: Yup. I bet if I posted on the internet somewhere that you liked them best people from all over the world would send you their licorice Chuckles. You would be inundated.
Husband: You mean there is somewhere where people talk about their favorite flavor Chuckle?
Me: Probably...
Husband: Sure, I love the black ones, they're my favorite!
Me: You are the only person on the planet that likes the licorice Chuckles.
Husband: Really?
Me: Yup. I bet if I posted on the internet somewhere that you liked them best people from all over the world would send you their licorice Chuckles. You would be inundated.
Husband: You mean there is somewhere where people talk about their favorite flavor Chuckle?
Me: Probably...
Thursday, August 6th
Me: (Poking Husband) Hey...
Husband: (Removing headphones) What?
Me: I put up the coffee. Whenever you want it, just hit the button.
Husband: (cupping my face in his hands, kissing me twice) I love you to pieces!
Me: As well you should...
Husband: (Laughing) Of Course!
Husband: (Removing headphones) What?
Me: I put up the coffee. Whenever you want it, just hit the button.
Husband: (cupping my face in his hands, kissing me twice) I love you to pieces!
Me: As well you should...
Husband: (Laughing) Of Course!
Tuesday, August 21st
Me: This store is starting to pluck at my nerves
Husband: Why?
Me: The prices. They're not paying anymore for these things than any other store in the area but they are charging way more.
Husband: Maybe they're charging for the cachet.
Me: I'm not paying for cachet. The only cachet I'm interested in is the cash-et in my pocket!
Husband: Why?
Me: The prices. They're not paying anymore for these things than any other store in the area but they are charging way more.
Husband: Maybe they're charging for the cachet.
Me: I'm not paying for cachet. The only cachet I'm interested in is the cash-et in my pocket!
Wednesday, August 15th
Me: Are we a little bit crazy, or just eccentric?
Husband: Why do you say that?
Me: Just take a look around you!
Husband: I prefer to say we are eclectic.
Husband: Why do you say that?
Me: Just take a look around you!
Husband: I prefer to say we are eclectic.
Friday, August 10th
Me: Do you want lettuce on your sandwich?
Husband: No
Me: Tomato?
Husband: No
Me; Ah, but extra mayonnaise, right?
Husband: Ah, you know me so well.
Me: When it comes to food anyway - mayonnaise, cheese - you're good to go.
Husband: Don't forget whipped cream..
Me: How could I possibly forget whipped cream. I know you well when it comes to food. Anything else inside your head - Not so much.
Husband: No
Me: Tomato?
Husband: No
Me; Ah, but extra mayonnaise, right?
Husband: Ah, you know me so well.
Me: When it comes to food anyway - mayonnaise, cheese - you're good to go.
Husband: Don't forget whipped cream..
Me: How could I possibly forget whipped cream. I know you well when it comes to food. Anything else inside your head - Not so much.
Sunday, August 5th
Me: Isn't it nice that Irving showed up. We tore that basement apart looking for him.
Husband: Obviously we didn't tear it up enough.
Me: But the packers found him.
Husband: Maybe he hid out because of the painting and the moving
Me: And then came out because he didn't want to get left behind.
Husband: Like the time your glasses disappeared for about a month and then mysteriously
Me & Husband: appeared in the bowl!
Husband: Now THAT was weird.
Me: Really strange...
Husband: Obviously we didn't tear it up enough.
Me: But the packers found him.
Husband: Maybe he hid out because of the painting and the moving
Me: And then came out because he didn't want to get left behind.
Husband: Like the time your glasses disappeared for about a month and then mysteriously
Me & Husband: appeared in the bowl!
Husband: Now THAT was weird.
Me: Really strange...
Tuesday, July 12th
Me: I love your new desk chair.
Husband: It's comfortable.
Me: I just love the color and shape - so clean and modern. If the base weren't so wide I would get rid of these dining chairs and get those instead.
Husband: I thought you didn't like the color green.
Me: I didn't - but lately I really like light green as an accent color - I would never wear green or paint walls green but...
Husband: You always loved red - everything red...
Me: For 54 years red was the only color for me, now I can't wear it - it makes me uncomfortable. People change you know.
Husband: Well SOME people do...
Husband: It's comfortable.
Me: I just love the color and shape - so clean and modern. If the base weren't so wide I would get rid of these dining chairs and get those instead.
Husband: I thought you didn't like the color green.
Me: I didn't - but lately I really like light green as an accent color - I would never wear green or paint walls green but...
Husband: You always loved red - everything red...
Me: For 54 years red was the only color for me, now I can't wear it - it makes me uncomfortable. People change you know.
Husband: Well SOME people do...
Sunday, June 17th
While going through old posts from my "regular" blog, I came across THIS post. What makes it pertinent to Today's Conversation is this bit:
My husband was watching our new little boy kitty chase his tail...
Husband: It must be nice to have a toy attached to your body
Me: Don't all men?
It took him 2 beats to get it...
Sunday, May 27th
Remember THIS conversation? Well here we go again...
Me: (Holding up a dark green wash cloth) Didn't you use your wash cloth this morning - it's bone dry.
Husband: I used the one on the left.
Me: That's mine! See you have the dark green towel with the matching dark green wash cloth, I have the light green towel with the light green wash cloth!
Husband: Oh - I thought you used a bath sponge..
Me: But now I am using a wash cloth - which matches my towel. How long have you been assigned to the dark green towel set?
Husband: I don't know - a long time???
Me: Are you color blind? It's the toothbrush thing all over again...And besides your wash cloth always hung on the right side!
Husband: Ooops...
Me: (Holding up a dark green wash cloth) Didn't you use your wash cloth this morning - it's bone dry.
Husband: I used the one on the left.
Me: That's mine! See you have the dark green towel with the matching dark green wash cloth, I have the light green towel with the light green wash cloth!
Husband: Oh - I thought you used a bath sponge..
Me: But now I am using a wash cloth - which matches my towel. How long have you been assigned to the dark green towel set?
Husband: I don't know - a long time???
Me: Are you color blind? It's the toothbrush thing all over again...And besides your wash cloth always hung on the right side!
Husband: Ooops...
Tuesday, May 1st
Husband: How come you have pickles and I don't?
Me: Because you don't want pickles.
Husband: How do you know I don't want pickles?
Me: Do you want pickles?
Husband: No, actually I don't.
Me: See, that's why I didn't give you any.
Me: Because you don't want pickles.
Husband: How do you know I don't want pickles?
Me: Do you want pickles?
Husband: No, actually I don't.
Me: See, that's why I didn't give you any.
Friday, April 6th
Me: The pizza came awfully quick
Husband: They were really busy when I called..
Me: Guess Good Friday and the first night of Passover doesn't mean much. Is Good Friday included in that whole Lent thing?
Husband: I don't know
Me: You went to Catholic school. Don't you remember anything about your childhood.
Husband: I don't remember much about any part of my life...
Me: How can you not remember your own life..?
Husband: I guess I just never paid attention..
Me: ::Laugh uproariously:: How do you not pay attention to your own life?
Husband: They were really busy when I called..
Me: Guess Good Friday and the first night of Passover doesn't mean much. Is Good Friday included in that whole Lent thing?
Husband: I don't know
Me: You went to Catholic school. Don't you remember anything about your childhood.
Husband: I don't remember much about any part of my life...
Me: How can you not remember your own life..?
Husband: I guess I just never paid attention..
Me: ::Laugh uproariously:: How do you not pay attention to your own life?
Thursday, March 15th
Me: (struggling to get off the couch) Ow, ow, ow - it hurts
Husband: I could tell
Me: Really - how?
Husband: The "ow, ow, ow" gives me a clue
Me: But my shoulder and back don't hurt when I reach forward, only when I move my shoulder back.
Husband: "Doctor, doctor - it hurts when I do this..."
Husband & I laughing: "So don't do that..."
Me: Right, so you got your own HBO special now?
Husband: I could tell
Me: Really - how?
Husband: The "ow, ow, ow" gives me a clue
Me: But my shoulder and back don't hurt when I reach forward, only when I move my shoulder back.
Husband: "Doctor, doctor - it hurts when I do this..."
Husband & I laughing: "So don't do that..."
Me: Right, so you got your own HBO special now?
Friday, February 3rd
Me: Just in case you were thinking about it - Don't.
Husband: Thinking about what???
Me: Valentine's Day is coming up - please don't get me anything.
Husband: Not even an edible arrangement?
Me: Nope - nothing. And I've got a surprise for you, I nominated you for the congressional medal of honor!
Husband: ::laughing:: Why?
Me: 'Cause you deserve it for putting up with me.
Husband: I don't "put up with you" - I love you.
Me: Honey, I get on my own nerves. Don't think I'm not aware of my behavior.
Husband: You don't get on my nerves and I know why you are the way you are.
Me: Maybe so, but still - it ain't easy.
Husband: But I do worry. When you have these melt-downs, I'm afraid you are going to stay there.
Me: Me too...
Husband: Thinking about what???
Me: Valentine's Day is coming up - please don't get me anything.
Husband: Not even an edible arrangement?
Me: Nope - nothing. And I've got a surprise for you, I nominated you for the congressional medal of honor!
Husband: ::laughing:: Why?
Me: 'Cause you deserve it for putting up with me.
Husband: I don't "put up with you" - I love you.
Me: Honey, I get on my own nerves. Don't think I'm not aware of my behavior.
Husband: You don't get on my nerves and I know why you are the way you are.
Me: Maybe so, but still - it ain't easy.
Husband: But I do worry. When you have these melt-downs, I'm afraid you are going to stay there.
Me: Me too...
Wednesday, January 18th
Me: Wasn't that nice that the man gave us these two oranges as gifts. I wonder why he likes us?
Husband: I don't know.
Me: We never spend more than $20 there and we don't go in all that often.
Husband: Don't know
Me: I bet he likes us 'cause he thinks we're cute. Everybody thinks we're cute!
Husband: (speaking in high-pitched old lady squeaky voice) Oh look Maudie, isn't that old couple cute! They're holding hands. They must be in love...
Me: ::cackling laughter::
Husband: I don't know.
Me: We never spend more than $20 there and we don't go in all that often.
Husband: Don't know
Me: I bet he likes us 'cause he thinks we're cute. Everybody thinks we're cute!
Husband: (speaking in high-pitched old lady squeaky voice) Oh look Maudie, isn't that old couple cute! They're holding hands. They must be in love...
Me: ::cackling laughter::
Sunday, January 15th 2012
Husband: What is that song you're humming?
Me: Don't know but can't get it out of my head.
Husband: I think it's by The Turtles
Me: OK, Let's look it up
(scrolling through youtube)
Husband: There, try that one - Happy Together
Me: No that's not it!
Husband: Yeah, that's not it.
Me: Now I can't get this song out of my head! (dripping sarcasm)Thanks!
Husband: Sorry
Me: And now I can't remember the other song and I liked it better!
Husband: (laughing) Sorry...
Me: Mr. Music Maven Smartass!
Me: Don't know but can't get it out of my head.
Husband: I think it's by The Turtles
Me: OK, Let's look it up
(scrolling through youtube)
Husband: There, try that one - Happy Together
Me: No that's not it!
Husband: Yeah, that's not it.
Me: Now I can't get this song out of my head! (dripping sarcasm)Thanks!
Husband: Sorry
Me: And now I can't remember the other song and I liked it better!
Husband: (laughing) Sorry...
Me: Mr. Music Maven Smartass!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)